You are at the entrance to Hades.
You can see:
 CSTACY getting gunned by tourists, who are zapping
   him with UDIRED, that has been reversed, so it guns only
   User-A people.
 There is also the ghost of Carl Hewitt (the
   scum himself) gunning Pinto and Devon.
>ring bell
Suddenly, the moaning stops, all is quiet as they
peer at you, looking and waiting for your next move.
>kill egbert with lock
It is a quick death, and egbert dies without any pain.
>destroy anti-udired program
Suddenly! A black caped figure floats in the air, he is 
obviously pleased. He says "Wonderful! You are worthy to 
even become the god of PANDA! You have saved ITS! For this
you will be given a fully authorised acount, a MIT 4 year
scholarship, and directories of your own on XX, DM, MC, AI,
ML, Multics, and EECS! All of ITS thank you for your bravery
above and beyond the call of Hacking!"
>wake up
Oh NO! You find yourself on the carpet, with the heavy feeling
of liquor on your breath, Sorry Charlie, You mixed to much
beer with hacking, it was all a dream...

	-- Author anonymous.
	   Found in a random file on a guest directory.